P.E. (a whole new meaning)

I deliberated over blogging about this, but for posterity sake I'm going for it. Choose your course.(the long, long or short of it)
THE LONG VERSION--
(background) We are expecting our third babe in February, this is earlier then we would normally share but it's already made it's way through the rumor mill, so we want the excitement that goes along with it.

I've been in the beginning dredges of pregnancy fatigue, nausea, vomiting etc. so a few weeks ago when the back aches began I'm thinking what a wimp I am, I'm giving myself pep talks "come on, laura, I thought you were hand cart material!" After almost two days and one MISERABLE night, a phone call to mom, and finally listening to my body I called Josh at work to have him look up instacare's in our insurance network. I had this hankering that I should call first (I didn't want to wait forever only to hear because I'm preg. they wouldn't see me) it was good I called because they did tell me I should go to the E.R. Josh watched the kids and I drove to the E.R.(around 3:30p.m.), Becky was in town and came to the hospital to keep me company shortly after I arrived.

I described my pain. Left side under shoulder blade that wrapped around to my chest, felt like broken ribs, unable to take deep breaths, and severe pain if I tried to recline at all. Doc says, "sounds mechanical" but goes ahead and orders a chest x-ray. Get warned and sign that I'm knowingly pregnant and getting an x-ray. (I'm the girl that takes every precaution while pregnant, they comfort me by saying it's okay just having one it's when you have multiple that there is cause for concern.) X-ray comes back clear, blood test comes back high level which could signify blood clots. Doc orders chest CT. After wheeling me in to radiology the tech completely terrifies me "wow, your in your first trimester...this is radiation...it's like having 300 x-rays", I'm asked to sign again that I am knowingly doing this procedure being pregnant. I timidly ask, "Isn't it necessary?" he goes on to explain my patients rights and responsibility. I'm totally confused and asked to be wheeled back to talk to the e.r. doc...again. He was a bit frustrated, patronizing but clearly gave his informed opinion. So back to radiology to go forward with the CT.

This ranks #1 in my pain to date experience. I know it sounds simple: Lay on my back flat and my arms overhead, completely still, follow breathing instructions. That was the longest most painful, traumatic five minutes even with oxygen on I could not catch a breath in that position and my back/chest pain off the charts. I think when result finally came back and the doctor explained I had two pulmonary embollisms(P.E.'s) in my chest I felt a weird sense of relief (a feeling of validation that I really did feel that pain, and the danger of the CT to the fetus was not for nothing).

I'm now a solid 5 hours into my E.R. visit. I've had no food, about 8oz. of water. Josh comes and switches out with Becky. He has the nurse get me some saltines. My new nurse zealously tries to manage my pain by giving me two doses of morphine, a lortab, and something else through my I.V. Meanwhile they are trying to get me admitted to another hospital because Altaview doesn't take Bluecross and we would be completely responsible if admitted there. Things are arranged to take me via ambulance to Jordan Valley. By this time the pain meds are all in and a complete shock to my system (In normal life, I have to be dying to take two ibuprofen). The poor paramedics have to move me convulsing, throwing up, and then dry heaving the ENTIRE 15 min. ambulance ride, wheeling me through a maze of a hospital, and switching me to my bed. It was my first ambulance ride. My only sweet relief was seeing Josh's headlights following right behind. The paramedics started fluids in my IV and a big dose of fenegren? which finally let's me sleep. It's after midnight.

Josh goes home to the kids, I sleep. I woke up and 4 a.m. sitting completely upright my legs in "Indian" position. I asked the nurse if I would get to go home that day and she said, "Sweetie, the doctor just said that of her 46 patients she's over you are of greatest concern. No, I don't think you will be going home today." How odd, I know it was serious but I don't think it had hit me. The next two days in the hospital were pretty uneventful...painful, lots of waiting. I learned how to give myself shots which I continue to do morning and night. I had leg ultrasounds, baby ultrasound, blood tests, more blood tests, dealt with weaning Clara cold turkey, etc.

The recovery has taken longer than I expected but am starting to have some pretty good days. I've been so grateful for the love and support of my family, friends, and even strangers in our new ward. I really prefer to be on the other side of service and found it very humbling. This promises to be a long, and memorable pregnancy. My dad said that sometimes these special spirits come at a cost. I think of that every morning and night when I give myself my $20 (after insurance cost) shot that will need to be taken the whole pregnancy. It's all worth it. We really are so excited to be a family of five and pray that all will continue to go well.


THE SHORT VERSION--were expecting!!! (not due till Feb. 21st), went to E.R. with bad back and chest pain, diagnosed with two P.E.'s (pulmonary embolisms/blood clots) in my lung, spent a few days in hospital, adjusting to giving twice daily shots to keep me anti coagulated, hoping for the least eventful pregnancy possible under these circumstances.

Service Awards---
"Steppin it up" goes to Josh for working hard at work to pay for all the meds. and boundless energy helping when he gets home.
"Unconditional love" to Clara Jane and Noah who still love me despite being a complete bump on a log. (PBS should get a shout out as well for their entertainment).

five years

Josh and I celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary. We had the most amazing 16 hour vacation ever! Liss watched the kids last minute and we headed up to the Park City Hotel to a cottage, dinner at Ruth's Chris. It seemed too simple to be so great, but it was. The stress of the day was long forgotten entering Parley's Canyon and fun memory sharing of the last five years ensued. It's funny how many big things happen in the midst of feels like the same 'ol, same 'ol. This is just a few of the major events...

Bought our first home in the Santa Cruz mountains three weeks before we were married (much to the dismay and chagrin of many friends) but it worked out great josh had time to move in and get things ready before we were married and it's where we spent our wedding night.
Three weeks after our wedding Josh leaves his steady corporate job to make his way on his own with real estate and mortgages (rocks Laura's tied to the dock, anchor loving stable boat)
Laura continues teaching 1st grade in Palo Alto (3 attempted burglaries in my classroom, 2 scary confrontations with thieves, my identity stolen)
Remodel our first home...while pregnant with Noah
Josh buys a home to flip in San Jose while we have our home in Los Gatos, a rental in Utah, and our future home on Coalville way that I won't see for the first 8 months we own it.
(Yep, that's four mortgages, one very pregnant wife, and one very stressed 24 year old.)
Laura works on her hands and knees trying to get the San Jose home ready to sell while extremely pregnant.
Sell the home in San Jose days before Noah is born and just before the California real estate bubble bursts
Our first born, little Noah comes.
Big scare with Noah in the NICU for one week when just three weeks old.
Move to Utah without having sold our home in Los Gatos and with no secure job for Josh - still feels right.
Josh finds temporary work as a lender rep and then starts with his current company First National Mortgage of Utah.
Fix up and sell our rental property in Provo.
Josh goes back to California to fix up our home in Los Gatos so we can sell it. We sell our Los Gatos home (it was so sad to sell that home that we loved so much)
Josh buys out his partners at the mortgage company.
One home, one child, one dog, life is simple.
One more addition, our sweet Clara Jane, life is even better.
Buy a new home, still in Draper.

It's interesting that our response typically to the question "Whats new?" is the ho-hum "nothing much" response. If you had told me on our wedding day that five years later we would have sold/bought/remodeled five homes, moved from CA to UT, visited China, traded in the Trooper and Passat to drive the 10 in every parking lot Pilot, and had two beautiful redhead children and a dog. Why that's plain crazy talk. Well here we are in a place where we were led and were we need to be. Can't even guess what is to come next.



(three squeezes josh)

Dad
user of trees, doorways as back scratchers,
father of the cannon ball, can opener
helper to all,
collector of a lot,
big dreamer, big doer
jolly,
wearer of hats,
sought after pioneer dance partner,
project leader,
flutist, conductor, bass singer extrodinaire,
stealer of noses,
piano mover,
excellent free throw shooter,
king of the dad jokes,
friend to the latinos,
teacher,
giver of advice,
seeker of truth,
loyal son, kind brother
righteous father
patriarch,
hard worker,
rough hands, softer heart
keeper of traditions,
rocket lancher,
mechanic,
cautious driver, tractor driver, boat driver
home builder,
builder of character,
goldtowner,
grandpa.

moving... part 2

The New HouseThe Old House
Morning after our first night in the home

oops, water heater had not been turned on so we boiled water on the stove and added it to the cold of the sink to bathe the kids...they didn't seem to mind
Grandma Pat helped Noah transition easily to life in the "country" (Don't worry Dad we will come to you for any real tractors)
Who needs toys when you have boxes to play in?

Wow, this has been quite a process and we are still not done. We began moving a few weeks ago and yet just brought our last load from the old house last night (now all that is left to do is clean and get her shining ...Liss and Mark move in next weekend so time is ticking). Yes, it is a circle of life, my sister and her husband are buying the South Mountain home which just solidifies how right this has felt from the start. We love that home and are so happy to have family who love it too get it. The new home is amazing but not without adjustments. I have turned around for a minute and lost Clara (she thinks its so funny to hide in closets), we laid sod in the back (25 pallets!!) Clara and Noah love to play in the dirt in the front pasture. Let's just say bathing is not just part of a calming, nighttime routine but a necessity, (they get so dirty). I find myself having to reign in my projects and keep perspective of what needs attention right now. I have this grand picture of the family tending the garden, gathering eggs from chickens, composting, canning our own fruit ...etc. Like all worthwhile labours it will take time. For now I need to happy with unpacking a few more boxes, while maintaining the every day upkeep of the house and tending my own chicks.

the move: part 1: ode to noah's neighborhood buddies

We moved to Utah and into our neighborhood right around Christmas 3 1/2 years ago. I remember a nice neighbor welcoming us and exclaiming we'd see them come spring. I found the comment a little odd but sure enough everyone kept tucked in their cozy homes (except for a friendly wave if you were out snow shoveling at the same time). Then, just as she said, as the snow melted, tulips peeked, and sun shone the streets filled with kids on bikes, scooters, neighbors out working in their yards visiting with one another. It turned into the most pleasant, friendliest suburb out there. So spring is definitely not the most ideal time to move. One walk around the block and I am saying, "how can I leave this." Can you tell I am getting melancholy already with this move? I know it will be especially tough on Noah to move from a neighborhood setting to more of a country feel. From the time he could walk he'd beg to go outside and play with the kids while they waited for their bus. Even still, as soon as he wakes from nap time he checks out the window and says, "my friends are waiting for me." He is usually greeted with kids running over to him, "Noah's out! Noah's out!" That is so sweet especially considering he is at least a year younger that most of the kids he plays with. Since Noah is too little to play out by himself, I've been out there with him the past three years getting to watch and interact with his buddies too. What fun. I'm hoping we will get to do the occasional play date even though we will be a whole 5 minutes away. (It is crazy that in Utah it means a whole different school, ward, even stake.)

happenings

Noah has been cracking us up daily with his little comments. Josh, in particular, wanted to make sure this one made the blog. On Friday, we were in the Costco parking lot (a typical family date night activity) and I was telling Josh where the new exit was (when I think someone is not seeing what I need them to see I tend to repeat myself louder and faster) Noah pipes up from his car seat, "Mom, Daddy knows how to drive." Josh could not have been more proud to have his buddy backing him up.

Saturday was a glorious spring day. We spent the morning washing cars, cleaning out the garage. A neighbor friend asked Noah to play at his house and to our surprise he answered, "no thanks, I want to stay with my mommy and daddy." Really, he chose work with the family over friends on his own. Josh and I glanced over at each other with big grins. I know those choices will have to made more and more as time goes on, I hope in years to come the answer will sometimes be the same.


Our sweet, mobile Clara was also part of the family work day. Unfortunately, she was just walking on the sidewalk and fell right on her face. She scraped her nose pretty good. This was her first big ouchy that has everyone asking "what happened?" Just a little reminder how easy the bumps and scraps can happen even when your just happily walking along in life. A few new developmental updates: clara jane's added clapping and high fives, and a new word (of sorts) dawh,dawh for doggies.

Which leads me to my last anecdote. I have had more than my share of Marley and Me moments the past week. We are dog sitting for my brother while they are in California for the week. (Trev got in a major accident while there...we love you, and are taking good care of roanin for you.) Roanin is a playful, energetic beagle and still a puppy. I was never good at chasing (not boys, not dreams) and now certainly not dogs. I have been out-run, out-smarted, and out-sized trying to get our little guest out of the house, toys out of his mouth etc. At one point after barricading with chairs, having Noah/Clara/Scout herding him, as I played the wrangler he still managed to bust through. I was so whipped I just laid on the floor and laughed, which led to kids copying mommy and Roanin himself seemed to chuckle at our pathetic attempts. I now know their (Trev,Cody,Tuck,Sadey's) fitness secret.

noah's prayer

During Noah's night prayers he did one of his fast ones "please bless mom..amen" I whisper a little prompt to also say what he is thankful for and he continues "thank you for my red helicopter from Aunt Beck, thank you for (pause) what fire truck did Jesus give me? (answers himself) I think it was the big one. Thank you for my big fire engine."